When life becomes the unexpected…

Planning. By nature that is what I do. In fact, I have a Plan A, Plan B, Plan C and probably a Plan D for everything I’m doing. Innately, I have always been a planner.

Truthfully, I have probably fallen victim to over planning for most of my life. In 2017, I was at a point in my life where I had accomplished most of my goals to date, but even with that success, I was left feeling miserable. In that moment, I realized I wouldn’t find true joy until I let God have control of my plans. I quickly realized releasing control would be one of the greatest challenges I face in my life.

In that season I adopted Proverbs 16:3, “Commit your works to the Lord, and your plans will succeed,” as my life verse.

I knew I needed a mindset shift. As I leaned into this new way of thinking, I went from making my plans fit into what I thought was God’s purpose for my life, to having Gods purpose for my life shape my plan.

Over the last few years, Paige and I have used this verse as the guiding compass as we navigate through life. With this mindset as our modus operandi it has been easy to see God’s goodness and favor all over our life, marriage, family, occupations, and calling. To be honest, so far God’s plan hasn’t been far off from what our plans would have been on our own.

Until recently.

We know that God is not a god of chaos, but a God of order.

“For God is not a God of confusion and disorder but of peace and order..” -1 Corinthians 14:33 (AMP)

God designed us to be organized, systematic, and planners. We know from scripture that God himself enjoys planning.

But this is where the challenge to our faith comes in. How do we move forward when God’s plan doesn’t look like what we had expected it to? Since Paige was admitted to the hospital and Harrison passed, this has been my daily struggle.

It’s easy to trust and believe in God’s plan for our lives when things are going well and seem to be going according to our plan; it becomes hard to trust God’s plan when the reality we’re in is not the reality we would have chosen for ourselves.

Each day Paige and I grapple with the fact that we are living in a reality we didn’t even know was possible. Some mornings it feels like we did something wrong, made a mistake, or just misheard God altogether.

We have to remind ourselves those thoughts are simply the lies of the enemy, and we must trust in Gods word. It was Jesus who said, “Do not let your hearts be troubled. You believe in God; believe also in me.” (John 14:1)

Even though we have sorrow, because where we are isn’t where we thought we would be; we choose to stay committed to what God has called us to. We choose to find purpose in our pain. We choose each morning to have joy.

Regardless of where you find yourself, if your current circumstance feels as if it doesn’t line up and fit in to what you had planned, do not forget that God is still in your midst. God is orchestrating his plans to redeem the hurt, the pain, the loss, the devastation. Have faith that regardless of where you are, God is still redeeming stories.

“So with you: Now is your time of grief, but I will see you again and you will rejoice, and no one will take away your joy. -John 16:22 (NIV)

joy is a choice.

The only thing in life that is certain is that each day is filled with uncertainty. For most of my life, I have chosen to conquer the day with the idea of “control the controllables.”

External circumstances. Uncomfortable situations. Personal vendettas. They all affect how a day comes at us. But how we respond is how our day will go. Ultimately, we don’t have significant control of what life throws at us, but only how we respond to it.

Give me any assessment or strength finder- I’ll guarantee you I will land in the highest percentile for high energy, optimism, and vision, every single time. Never in my life have I been mentally hindered by external circumstance. I have built my life on all the clichés.

Where there is a will, there is a way.
Believe you can and you’re halfway there.
It’s not whether you get knocked down, its whether you get back up.

But this. This is different.

Since Harrison passed away, each new day brings a unique set of challenges. A set of challenges that I have never faced before. Each day, I wake up uncertain of who I am going to be.

There have been a few mornings I have woken up and wanted to forget it all. Forget that Paige and I even had a son. I have tried to trick myself. If I can force it out of my mind, then maybe the pain and the hurt will go away. But then a quick glance at his face on my phone and I’m reminded of the 72 days we had him and I know it would be worth going through all the pain again.

Some mornings I wake up completely overwhelmed with sadness. It’s those mornings that I can’t get out of my head the memory of rocking him in the hospital at 3:30 am because he was so uncomfortable. It leads me to want nothing more than to just hold Harry J again.

Other mornings I wake up with a sense of nostalgia. Those mornings are the ones that I wish I could have one more “Boys Club”. Every morning at 5am before work I would go visit Harrison in the NICU just to be able to hold him- I would send Paige a picture each morning from the “Boys Club”.

Then there is most mornings. Most mornings, I wake up numb. It’s those days that I don’t feel much at all. The days just feel so empty of purpose. It seems as if everything that Paige and I thought we were working towards was completely taken from us.

I still want to conquer the world. I still want to work on a thousand new business ventures. I’m still working towards God’s calling on my life. But the days just feel different.

I know that God is going to work our tragedy for His glory. We also have no doubt that through the mission of the Harry J Foundation countless number of families will be touched and ministered to. We are standing in faith and believing that even in our greatest pain, God will reveal his purpose.

However, it is in these days that I have found how easy our minds can drift. How easy our mindset can change our trajectory. Even with my faith, if I am not careful I will allow my mindset to get stuck how I woke up. Each morning, I face a big challenge: I can either stay in my mood or choose to rejoice in the hope of Christ.

Simply put: joy is a choice. Although it’s a simple phrase, it has the ability to become a powerful mindset.

“So we are convinced that every detail of our lives is continually woven together to fit into God’s perfect plan of bringing good into our lives, for we are his lovers who have been called to fulfill his designed purpose.” -Romans 8:28 (TPT)

Purpose in the Pain

Just over a week ago, Paige and I had to endure an experience that we had never anticipated. An experience that we wouldn’t wish on anyone. After just 72 days with us, we lost our son. At Paige’s request, I was able to muster up enough strength to speak at Harrison’s Celebration of Life.

Below are the words that I shared:

On behalf of both Paige and I, I want to thank you for joining us to celebrate the life of Harrison. The outpouring of love that we have felt over the last few days has been absolutely incredible to say the least. A few days ago on social media I shared a passage from A Grief Observed, that I would like to share again today “We were promised sufferings. They were part of the program. We were even told, ‘Blessed are they that mourn,’ and I accept it. I’ve gotten nothing that I hadn’t bargained for. Of course it is different when the thing happens to oneself, not to others, and in reality, not imagination.”

C.S. Lewis having walked through his own tragic loss could not have more perfectly expressed the state in where Paige and I find ourselves today- in a reality that we never imagined.

See for us we thought our reality would look totally different than this. Kids have been part of our plan from the start. In fact, Paige and I have often joked that we wanted a very large family. But we agreed we wouldn’t have more than 13 kids, so that way we could all fit inside of a 15 passenger van. Over the last several years, we have begun to understand with such clarity the purpose that God has for our lives. With that, we have been standing on His promises of having a large family.

Again, as C.S. Lewis mentioned- It’s easy to talk about loss and suffering when it is an abstract thought and not your reality. If I am being honest, I thought we were on the path to the reality that we imagined.

We had no trouble getting pregnant. So, I thought we had dodged a bullet- too many people have to walk through the struggle of infertility. Then at 29 weeks, Paige was admitted to the hospital and placed on bedrest. We vigorously prayed that Harrison would stay inside the womb till at least 31 weeks. He made it 34 weeks. Not what we had imagined, but still another bullet dodge- too many people have to walk through the struggle of a miscarriage or a stillbirth.

For the first 51 days of Harrison’s life he spent it inside of the NICU. For 47 of those days, he was only working on taking bottles. He didn’t have spells. He didn’t need the support of oxygen. He was consistently gained weight. He was just what they call a “feeder grower”. Not the reality that we had imagined, but another dodged bullet- too many people never see their baby leave the NICU.

After leaving the NICU, we got to spend the next 11 days at home with Harrison. Those 11 days that we spent at home as a family were everything that we had hoped for. It was in the quiet moments of holding him that my mind began to race of all the things that we would do as a family. All the trips we would take. All the experiences we would share. All the lessons of life that I would teach him. We were finally beginning to see the reality that we imagined. We dodged another bullet- we got to bring our “healthy” baby home and experience normalcy as new parents.

I do not know if I will ever be able to describe the feeling of joy that I had watching Paige take care of Harry J. I told her so many times, but it’s true- she truly was the best advocate for him and the best mother that he could have ever had. In fact, I could sit around for hours and just watch the way that she looked and him and the way he looked back at her. To experience watching the innate love between mom and baby is incredible.

But those moments were cut short.

Harrison had just got finished with his bottle and we were snuggled on the couch. After a few minutes, I realized something was not right. Then tragedy hit again. We found ourselves loaded up in the car headed back to the last place that we wanted to take our child- the hospital. After hours of testing and labs being drawn, we had dodged a bullet again, or so we thought, because Harrison was acting like himself again.

During that last hospital stay, doctors were giving us many speculative diagnoses and grim prognoses; but the anthem that carried us through that time was “Hope until there is no Hope, Faith until there is no Faith.” It was in those days that Paige and I hung on to that mantra with everything that we had. Although I wish I could say every thought we had was strong and faith filled- there were moments when what we were walking through seemed like too much to handle.

Five days before Harrison passed away, I was rocking him in his hospital room and as was our usual we had the “Best of Live Worship” Spotify playlist playing. I was sitting there with my faith waning; and I began to focus on the lyrics of the song You Made a Way that was playing- and in that moment I felt so clearly the Holy Spirit say to me “he wasn’t yours to begin with.” With tears pouring down my face, I shared with Paige that Harrison was God’s and not ours. As much as we loved Harrison, our love could never match the love that God has for him. God gave us Harrison as a gift. A gift that we are going to treasure forever.

While this hasn’t made it easier to deal with the grief or the loss of not having Harry J physically with us; it has given us hope in this season. We find hope in that we know our God given purpose. We find hope in the words that Paul wrote in Romans 8:28- “For we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose.” In this season, just like every other season, we find our hope in Christ, and Christ alone.

We want to celebrate the life that Harrison lived. Twenty-three times I wrote specifically in my prayer journal that God would use Harrison for his glory. From the moment we knew we were pregnant until he was born, I prayed specifically that God would anoint Harrison, He would guide his steps, He would use him to glorify His Kingdom, and that no other purpose would prevail than the calling God had on his life. While we don’t know why this was God’s plan and purpose- I know that this was God’s plan and purpose for Harrison. While Paige and I will at times be sad, angry, and confused; know that we are standing on God’s promise that everything we have prayed for will come to pass. We know that God will use the life of Harrison in a “large and mighty” way.

Over the last several days we have had countless people ask how they could help us in this time; which led us to start the Harry J Foundation. In the coming weeks, The Harry J Foundation will unveil its vision and mission as a 501(c)3 non-profit committed to helping others in their seasons of pain. For updates on the Harry J Foundation or to partner with us visit harryjfoundation.org.

Welcome Back

Welcome to 2021.

It’s nearly been twelve months to the day since I last wrote and published a blog. To be honest, it’s been too long.

Over the last twelve months our world has changed around us. The effects of the global pandemic will ripple through our culture for years to come. The effects of racial injustices will continue to hinder equality for all citizens in our nation. The effects of a polarizing election will stifle unity in our public discourse. The effects of natural disasters will ravage our communities. The truth is the effects and aftermath of 2020 will change us forever.

But is that not the case of every year?

Every year we experience changes around us that effect our perception of the world and life; due to the nature of 2020 those instances were heightened.

The last twelve months were no different for me and my family. We had to navigate through pandemics, unrest, loss, and natural disasters while still figuring out married life; throw in the wrench of a complicated pregnancy with a two plus month hospital stay to make 2020 a doozy of a year.

Even with all that we experienced- the ups and the downs, Paige and I had our best year yet. Regardless of the challenge that we faced, we were able to hold onto the promises of God’s faithfulness.

Over the next few weeks I want to share some of the incredible moments that point to those promises of God’s faithfulness. But, I also want to share some of the bleak moments that have made us question, “why God?” We know that God’s hand is in the midst of these moments, but we simply don’t have all the answers yet.

I hope you will join me as I share some truths we discovered over the last twelve months. But more importantly, I hope that you will see the evidence of God’s faithfulness. Whether you read another blog or not, my hope is that it will spark your reliance on God alone.

Patience or Frustration?

Last week I put myself out there in a way I never had before.

Throughout the years, I have constantly heard that I was a “leader.” However, as I reflected on the numerous mistakes, some small and some extremely detrimental, I’ve made along the way, I began to doubt that. In the process of working through this time of self-reflection, I reached out to ten individuals that I interact with on a regular basis for insight. My ten individuals consisted of family members, co-workers, those I lead, colleagues, and friends. I asked each of them to be as brutally honest as possible and to answer two simple questions; what are my top three strengths and my top three areas for growth. While this seems like a very simple exercise, it revealed a lot about how others see me and my ability to lead.

As someone who typically assumes a position of leadership, the strengths they listed didn’t surprise me. What did surprise me was the most common response for growth; patience.

Out of the ten respondents, eight of them included patience in some form, specifically for my future. If eighty percent of people that I interact with on a regular basis believe that I need to grow in the area of patience, there must be some truth to it. It made me think long and hard about it.

After a few days of reflection, it finally hit me that they were only partially right. While I will admit that I have historically been very impatient, especially when trying to accomplish goals for my future, I know I am in a process of transformation.

However, if I looked back over the last decade of my life and used that metric as they did, I would agree with all of them. I do need to be patient for my future. The path of self-destruction I was on to achieve my lofty goals only caused me frustration. But the bigger question I asked was, why? Why has this path caused me such frustration? Even with success, I still experienced frustration.

The answer was simple. I was striving to achieve goals that weren’t meant for me. Don’t hear me wrong, my goals weren’t bad goals, but they weren’t the ones I was called to.

My experience reminds me of the story of Jonah. Jonah knew that God was calling him to fulfill a certain purpose, to “proclaim judgement” against the city of Nineveh. But Jonah had plans of his own and “ran from the presence of the Lord” to a different city. While on his journey he caused a little trouble and found himself inside the belly of a large fish; I can guarantee you that he was frustrated for those three days and nights. Eventually, even in his disobedience, Jonah found himself on the path to fulfill his calling.

While the journey looks different for all of us, I am thankful that we serve a God that can use us for our calling, regardless of when we submit.

Although I’ve had my own experience with disobedience, I finally find myself committing only to pursue what I have been called to. For the first time in my adult life, I do not feel a burden associated with achieving my goals. My sense of peace affirms that I am beginning to walk where God has called me.

The level of freedom and pure joy that I have experienced by returning to the path of my true calling is indescribable. While I would not trade the lessons that I have learned over the last fifteen years, part of me can only imagine where I might be if I didn’t run from my calling.

I don’t know where you currently find yourself, but if you are experiencing frustration in life, maybe you’re chasing the wrong goals. I encourage you to take a look at what you’re trying to accomplish.

5 Steps for a Successful Decade

We have officially entered the greatest time of the year! (Well maybe the second best after football season, but that is neither here nor there.) For as long as I can remember, the time between Thanksgiving and the end of the year has been the best time of the year. When I was younger, it meant light school work and Christmas presents galore. While I was in college, it meant no responsibilities along with a little extra time to get into mischief. As I have gotten older, this season has taken on a completely different meaning. While I still enjoy the Christmas festivities and extra time with family, it’s become a time to rest, reflect, and prepare for the new year.

For most of us, even if we do reflect and prepare for the new year, it’s typically done during the dead week between Christmas and New Year’s. Relegating a year’s worth of goals and planning into seven short days after wrapping up the Christmas season is just not smart. In fact, most of us use that time to rest but we don’t plan. (Side note: Resting is good, if you don’t believe me go read the blog from 11.12.19.) This is typically the reason why we feel so rushed going into the new year, and spend the first couple months just getting acclimated.

The last six years I have worked to utilize the entire season as a time to rest, reflect, and plan. The difference that I have experienced by being more intentional has been significant. There are five typical steps that make up the format, or framework, that I use to feel more prepared going into the New Year.

Step 1: Set Goals.

It goes without saying that you have to establish goals. Read any “self-help” book, regardless of the topic- finance, leadership, management, sales, etc- they all start here. In order to determine if you are heading in the right direction, you have to establish goals.

Step 2: Focus less on others, more on self.

Sometimes, for me, this one becomes the most challenging. In today’s social media world, we easily become distracted by what others are doing. We see they made a big sale, bought a new car, bought a new house, got married, or had a baby, and immediately we forget all about the goals we set and accomplished for ourselves. Not only will this eliminate drama, but it will also make you more content.

Step 3: Read More.

Like your average American, I never truly enjoyed reading. However, after I graduated college I realized that simply having a degree doesn’t give you all the knowledge to excel in your career or to reach higher levels. I began to look around and see that those who are highly successful are reading at least 1-2 books a month. I am not necessarily trying to get Bill Gates level of money, but if he is reading 50+ books a year, there is probably something to it.

Step 4: Invest In yourself.

This should go without saying, but no one is going to invest in you more than you. It’s not the responsibility of your employer, your family, your friends, or anyone else to invest in you. The responsibility falls on you as an individual to look for opportunities to improve; which could mean a whole host of different things. It may be going to a conference, paying for an online seminar, or taking a class at a community college; whatever that looks like make sure that it aligns with your goals.

Step 5: Pursue Christ to develop your calling.

Above all of the other steps, this is the most important. I will admit that Step 5 is the newest addition to my framework, something I’ve only added within the last few years. In the years without this step I made progress, but not nearly as significant of progress as in these last 3 years, when I have been intentional (there’s that word again) about my pursuit of Christ. When you are pursuing Christ and the calling on your life, you begin to walk with more clarity; which causes your goals to realign to where God is leading (thus making it that much easier).

I hope that by taking these five steps you will be able to reach the level you have been striving for in 2020!

Failing to plan is planning to fail.

Marriage, a month in

It’s hard to believe that it has already been four whole weeks. Truthfully, this first month of marriage has flown by for both of us. As you read in the last blog, or may have heard Charlie say (it’s his favorite story), 8 of the last 30 days were spent in Mexico, so how could it be bad?

As we have begun adjusting to this new normal, we wanted to write a blog together to share what we’ve learned thus far.

Be INTENTIONAL—you’ve heard us say this before. Intentional was our word from the very first weekend we went on a date, and it has stuck ever since. We’ve seen it happen with friends, family, acquaintances—they begin to feel unseen, unheard, unloved…it’s a major issue in our society. Ask yourself every day, is my spouse getting the best of me, or just my leftovers?
Keep going on dates! We’ve made it a plan to have at least one date day/night a week. No phones, just each-others undivided attention to truly communicate without distraction and to make new memories. We want to get in this habit now because we know once kids come along, this will be even harder to do, but even more important!
Cherish each other—while we were engaged we read a book called Cherish by Gary Thomas. The little things matter—what can you be doing to show the other person you truly care? Maybe it’s coming home from a long day of work to dinner and the chores being done, or maybe it’s walking your dog in the snow while the other stays warm inside.
Communicate early and often—have something bothering you? TALK ABOUT IT! Don’t let things build up and eat away at you until you blow up. If there is an issue, find a win-win solution—don’t let there be a winner or a loser.
Have fun, be playful. Don’t think that just because you’re an old married couple now that you can’t flirt with each other!

We hope this blog will encourage others in their marriage, but most importantly will serve as a reminder for us in the years to come. As the years go by and the “newness” fades, we want to be able to look back to see what made our marriage so strong in the beginning.

We are obviously still very new at this marriage thing and just figuring it out, so if you have tips that you would add to the list drop them in the comments below!

We are so excited and expectant for how God is going to move in this new season. He continues to remind us on a daily basis, that He is in control, and that as long as He is our foundation, together we can move mountains.

Marriage, thirty days in. Best. Decision. Yet.

Relax, we’re all busy

Busy. Busy is what planning a wedding will make you. It will make you so busy that you will probably go over a month without posting a blog… my bad. I promise to try and do better; but let’s be honest, life is just busy. The thing is though, I am not the only one that experiences busyness.

Busy is how we live our lives. In fact, in America we wear our busyness as a badge of honor. The busier we are then somehow the more significant our life is and the greater our impact will be. I can say that I too fell into the trap of the busier the better. If I am being transparent, I am currently in the process of coming out of the busiest season of my life. After looking back over this past season, I can confidently say that most of it was self-inflicted. By nature, I like to say yes. By God’s design, I like to lead. So when asked to oversee this, manage that, run this; I have historically always said yes. I am now intentionally practicing my “no”; because in the end most of it is meaningless.

Of course, there were many great things that happened in this past season of saying yes. My renewed commitment to Christ. My new marriage. The resurrection of old dreams. The new found clarity on my purpose. But, on the whole, I can say that the sleepless nights and non-stop days working were not worth it.

I can admit that over the last few years, I have heard several sermons on taking days to rest- or practicing the Sabbath; but none of them actually connected until recently.

About three weeks ago, Paige and I were preparing to board a plane for Mexico to celebrate our honeymoon. On this trip I took a massive step… I left my work phone at home. In fact, I left everything work related in the US. I decided to leave it as a commitment to my new wife, and as a symbol of the beginning of our marriage focused solely on us.

If I am being honest though, I was pretty anxious leaving work behind. Ever since joining the “real” workforce at the age of 19, I had never been on a vacation where I was not “available” to those back home. Most of my career has been in sales, where you are always available to your customers. When I owned my own insurance agency, I was accessible 24/7 to my staff and clients. So for me, I was going to be truly disconnected for the very first time.

But what was I so anxious about? I mean, do I think I am really that valuable to my company? Of course not. I was anxious because I was afraid of “falling behind” the competition.

“Therefore I tell you, stop being worried or anxious about your life, as to what you will eat or what you will drink; nor about your body, as to what you will wear. Is life not more than food, and the body more than clothing? Look at the birds of the air, they neither sow nor reap nor gather into barns, and yet your heavenly Father keeps feeding them. Are you not worth much more than they?” – Matthew 6:25-26

I once heard a Pastor say that we have become more concerned with the pursuit of the American Dream than we are fulfilling the calling of God. Quite simply, that’s the truth for me. At the root of my anxiousness is the lack of trust in God’s provision.

But after a day or two in Mexico, I slowly started to realize that something was happening. I was becoming recharged. Now that we are back in our normal routine, I feel more refreshed and rejuvenated than I ever have.

Rest is a reoccurring theme seen throughout the Bible. God designed us to rest. Isn’t it amazing that when I finally found time to rest, I became more aware of God’s presence.

Paige and I have begun working on our family goals for 2020, and you better believe that at the top of the list is a WEEKLY SABBATH. Or in other words, a day of intentional rest. Time that we can rest and rejuvenate in God’s presence.

My challenge for everyone reading this is to rest. We are all in different seasons and have different circumstances that effect our decisions; but I assure you in the end all of the tireless work will be meaningless. While this concept seems counter-cultural, my goal for 2020 is to do less. I am putting my faith in accomplishing more with God in six days than I can by myself in seven days.

Less is more with God.

365 Days Later

In preparation for a major decision before me, I had a conversation with my good friend, Keith. In that conversation, Keith made a statement that could not have been more of a divinely inspired truth than if it came out of the mouth of Billy Graham himself. In the midst of our conversation, Keith said, “One year from now our lives are going to look completely different.” Boy, was he right; because three hundred and sixty-five (365) days ago my entire life changed forever.

On September 30, 2018, I woke up in Boulder, Colorado in the wee hours of the morning, hoping to catch a beautiful sunrise over the mountains in Estes Park. I wasn’t alone on this journey though, my girlfriend was sitting (sleeping) in the seat next to me in our rented Camaro. As we drove towards Brainard Lake that morning, I knew my life was going to change, while she on the other hand just anticipated another failed attempt of ours to catch the sunrise (side note- we don’t have the best track record of actually experiencing sunrises).

We arrived to Estes Park in total darkness and stumbled our way to what I had described to Paige as the “premier” spot. The only problem I encountered was trying to sell her on that spot, because she knew we should have been on the other side of the mountain to see a clear shot of the sunrise. Inside, she was marking this down as another failed attempt to see the sunrise.

Fast forward half an hour, Paige lost track of the fact that we were on the wrong side of the mountain, when she noticed that I was down on one knee. If you haven’t followed along with the story up until this point, Paige and I got engaged 365 days ago.

Many lessons have been learned this past year. I have learned how to be more loving. I have learned how to be a better communicator. I have learned to trust God more. I have learned that I will fail Paige.

Many things have changed this past year. I have moved three times. I have sold a house. I have sold two cars. I have shut down a business. I have started a new job.

While the external changes are important, the internal changes are that much more important. Most people will only see the external transitions, but may miss altogether the internal transitions I have experienced.

As I reflect on the last year, I cannot help but become more excited about the years to come. Paige and I are only 18 days away from making a life-time commitment of forever to each other, but also making a pledge to commit our marriage to whatever God calls us to. Over the last year, God has revealed promises to both of us that we know will never come to fruition without His hand of provision. From the outside looking in, it may not seem like all the pieces are fitting together. It may not look like we are taking life defining risks, but the changes that we have experienced internally together have influenced the trajectory of our lives and marriage. The changes haven’t been quick or overnight; but rooted in God’s timing.

“So be humble under God’s powerful hand. Then he will lift you up when the right time comes. Give all your worries to him, because he cares for you” – 1 Peter 5:6-7 ERV

When we began dating, we committed to being intentional. By being intentional in our relationship with each other and with Christ, we have experienced unexplained favor. Together, we are looking forward to our next season of life as we enter it with expectancy.

You need to know that no matter where life has you positioned right now, real life change can happen. However, that life change will only happen when you begin to press in and allow the Holy Spirit to work within you. As the work is being done within you, you will gradually become more like Christ.

You may not notice the change right away, but you will see it when you reflect back 365 days later. I can assure you of this, “One year from now our lives are going to look completely different.”

365 Days = Life Change.

Feels Like ’98

At the time of this post we are only 2 days away from the greatest time of the year… FOOTBALL SEASON. If I’m being honest, I actually don’t care about football season. Let me explain, I truly only care about Tennessee football. If there was a world where I could only hear Vols updates and never have to hear about Alabama, Florida, or Georgia, life would be great. If I am being honest, it’s been tough over the last few years; but without a doubt, I get just as amped for the start of a new season. I would be delusional if I didn’t accept the fact that my beloved Vols have had a rough go the last few years (a few is actually a stretch).

I am one of those guys that loves to know all of my facts before I say things. It makes me seem more educated and at the very least, level headed. For example, did you know that Tennessee still ranks as the 10^thmost winningest program in all of College Football? Tennessee is the home of Six National Championships. Tennessee has beaten Alabama more than any other team in the nation, 38 times to be exact. Tennessee has appeared in 50 bowl games with 26 victories, which also puts them in the Top 10 of Bowl Appearances and Victories. With all of this success though, the Vols of my lifetime have been all over the board.

In my first decade of life, Tennessee was one of the most dominate teams in the nation. In the 90’s, Tennessee won 99 of their 123 games; giving them a win percentage of 80.49%. The 90’s were great, most particularly 1995-1998 when the Vols went 45-5. Truthfully, I didn’t know what I was getting the privilege of experiencing as a fan.

The next decade saw a bit of a slowdown and the exit of the Winningest Active Coach; leaving our decade record to a mere 83-44, a winning percentage of only 65.35%. But alas, things began to get even worse. In fact, we still have a year left in this decade and we have lost only nine fewer games than we did in the first 20 seasons (two decades) of my life.

At this point, you are probably thinking, “why did I just get a history lesson on Tennessee football?” The reason is quite simple. You can see that I am vested in this team returning to the Glory Days. Without a doubt you can see my passion for Tennessee football. You can also see my hopefor better seasons to come.

People regularly question my hope in the return of a dominant Tennessee football team. (Mostly bandwagon Alabama fans that wouldn’t even be able to tell you who Mike DuBose or Dennis Franchione are). But do people ever question my hope in Christ?

Paul writes in 1 Peter 3:15- “Instead, you must worship Christ as Lord of your life. And if someone asks about your hope as a believer, always be ready to explain it.”

Paul wrote that knowing that if we are truly living as Christ followers, non-believers (the world) would look at us and questions our hope. He knew that if we were living the called life that we would stand out from the crowd. Paul shows us that it’s not a question of “if” we are going to be asked about our hope, but a question of “when”.

I can honestly say that I have been questioned more about my hope in the Vols than I have about my hope in Christ.

Reflecting on that reality and on Paul’s verse, it forced me to do an inward examination of how I live out my faith. I want to live a life that is so full of faith and hope in Christ that people question where it comes from. I want to live a life that doesn’t allow circumstance to effect my thoughts or actions. I want to live the life that Christ has called me to.

We are all called to live life more abundantly in Christ. When the odds are stacked against you, when the diagnosis wasn’t what you hoped, when the finances aren’t adding up… we are still called to live more abundantly. It is in these moments that people begin questioning your hope in Christ the most. You have a choice. Allow the circumstances to dictate your situation or place your hope in Christ.

“ The thief comes only to steal and kill and destroy. I came that they may have life and have it abundantly.” John 10:10 (ESV)

Hope in Christ Alone.